How do you receive Feedback?

How do you receive Feedback?

Every day, not just at Mid-Year, we receive feedback from the people around us.  This might be your manager, peers, direct reports and even family and friends.  It is how we take in the feedback and what we do with the feedback that matters. 

A great #careerhack that I learned some 20+ years ago, was to always receive feedback like a gift.  To do this, you have to believe the person giving the feedback has the best intentions for you and your development.   

After framing your mind with that positivity (“good intentions”), here are five steps that Hays Consulting recommends you take to receive feedback like a pro:

Actively engage with what you are hearing.  Ask yourself, “What is the key message being delivered?”

Pay attention to the feedback givers emotions and body language.  Those will help you understand how the feedback giver is feeling giving you the feedback and in turn helps you adjust to how you respond to them.  For example, in really difficult conversations the feedback giver may tense up or use a lot of words in giving the feedback.  This is especially important when receiving feedback from family and/or friends.

Convey what you have understood from the feedback.  Understanding the feedback (not defending or apologizing or describing how you will rectify it) and conveying it back concisely shows the feedback giver that you heard.  NOTE:  I recommend scheduling follow-up conversations with the individual with some time between to share what you will do with the information. 

Thank the feedback giver for the feedback.   It is amazing how a simple thank you can open the doors for future feedback. 

Throughout the feedback session, I will always ask permission before asking questions.  The simple phrase, “do you mind if I ask a question about x?” Can go a long way to ensure the conversation is two-way and that you walk away fully understanding.

I recommend scheduling follow-up conversations with the individual with some time between to share what you will do with the information.   For the duration of my career, I have always sent a follow-up to my performance feedback thanking my manager for the investment of time with the items that I am going to focus on and describing to him/her how I was going to take action.   Overkill?  Maybe, but my management knows that I heard them and that I am committed to focusing on the behavior or initiative with some high-level action bullets of how. 

Happy Thursday!

-srt