Start Messy. Start Scared. Start Now.

We spend so much time waiting for the right moment.

When things feel clearer.
When confidence shows up.
When the plan feels airtight.
When fear finally quiets down.

But here is the truth most people do not want to hear.

That moment rarely comes.

Growth does not begin with certainty. It begins with courage.

So many dreams stall out not because they are impossible, but because we believe we need to feel ready before we begin. We tell ourselves we will start when we know all the steps, feel confident instead of nervous, have the perfect tools or timing, or are sure it will work.

But readiness is a moving target. The more you wait for it, the further away it seems.

Clarity does not come before action.
Clarity comes from action.

Starting messy means giving yourself permission to be imperfect. It means accepting that the first draft will be rough, the first attempt may wobble, and the first version will not be your best.

And that is not a flaw.
It is the process.

Messy beginnings teach you faster than overthinking ever will. They build momentum instead of fear and replace self doubt with real experience. Every expert you admire once stood exactly where you are now.

Starting scared does not mean you are doing it wrong.

Fear is not a stop sign. It is a signal. It often shows up when something matters, when you are stretching beyond what is familiar, when growth is actually happening.

Confidence is not the absence of fear.
Confidence is choosing to move forward with fear present.

You do not need to eliminate fear to begin. You only need to stop letting it make the decisions.

Someday feels safe.
Now feels uncomfortable.

But now is where change lives.

Starting now might look like sending the email you keep rewriting, sharing the idea even though it feels unfinished, having the honest conversation you have been avoiding, or taking one small step toward the goal that keeps calling you.

You do not need the whole staircase.
You only need the next step.

So just start.

Not perfectly.
Not confidently.
Not with every answer.

Just start.

Because the version of you who learns along the way is far more powerful than the version who stays stuck waiting.

Start messy.
Start scared.
Start now.

Everything changes when you do.

Happy Monday lovelies,

-srt

#MondayMotivation #GetoutofBed #ReaCoachingandConsulting

DEI Through the Lens of Law and Faith

 …it all started with a comment from a student who had heard that DEI puts unqualified people in jobs while taking jobs away from white people.

I did not hear that comment as anger. I heard it as fear. And confusion. And a question many people are quietly carrying but do not know how to ask out loud.

This is not a rebuttal. It is not a takedown. It is a hug. And an invitation to slow down, breathe, be curious and look at what DEI actually is through the lens of the law and through the lens of faith.

Let us start with the law.

In the United States, it is illegal to hire someone simply because of their race, gender, or identity. That has been true for decades.

To tighten it up further, let me qualify the above as this:

U.S. law has long prohibited hiring someone solely because of race, sex, or identity, with narrow, well-defined exceptions such as bona fide occupational qualifications, religious roles, and limited remedial programs.  Those exceptions are narrow, role-specific, and do not permit blanket or automatic preferences.

Equal Employment Opportunity laws such as the Civil Rights Act, the Equal Pay Act, the Americans with Disabilities Act, and the Age Discrimination in Employment Act do not allow employers to replace job-related qualifications with identity-based preferences. Instead, they require that qualified people are not excluded because of bias.

DEI does not mean hiring unqualified people.
It does not mean lowering standards.
It does not mean taking jobs away from one group to give them to another.

What the law requires is that employment decisions are based on qualifications related to the job and not on stereotypes, assumptions, or past patterns of exclusion.

When DEI is done correctly and legally, it expands access to opportunity. It does not remove protection from anyone. White applicants are still protected by the same laws. Fairness is not something that runs out.

Equity is not favoritism.

One of the biggest misunderstandings centers on the word equity.

Equity does not mean everyone gets the same outcome.
It means everyone gets a fair chance to compete.

If two people are equally qualified, the law does not say one must be chosen because of their background. It says that background cannot be the reason someone is ignored or dismissed.

That is not punishment. That is integrity.

Now let us talk about something deeper.

Because even if the law did not require fairness, faith would still call us to it.

The Bible is clear about how we are meant to treat one another.

“My dear brothers and sisters, how can you claim to have faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ if you favor some people over others?"  James 2:1

“He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness and to walk humbly with your God?"  Micah 6:8 

Justice. Mercy. Humility.

DEI at its heart is not about politics or labels. It is about asking honest questions. 

• Are we seeing people clearly? 
• Are we judging character and ability instead of assumptions? 
• Are we creating spaces where people can use the gifts God gave them?

Scripture repeatedly reminds us to care for those who have been overlooked or pushed aside. Not because they are better. But because they are human.

“The body does not consist of one member but of many.”  1 Corinthians 12:14

A body works best when every part is valued, respected, and allowed to function fully.

A softer truth we do not say often enough.

When people fear that DEI means they will lose something, that fear deserves compassion. Not dismissal.

Fear often comes from not being seen and that matters.

But fairness for others is not loss for you.

A just system does not remove your seat at the table. It makes sure the table was built to hold everyone.

The heart of it.

DEI is not about replacing merit.
It is about removing barriers that never should have existed.

It is not about guilt.
It is about responsibility.

It is not about division.
It is about dignity.

Whether you approach this conversation through the law or through faith, the message is strikingly similar.

See people clearly.
Judge fairly.
Act with love.

That is not radical.
That is human.
And for many of us, it is deeply biblical.

If we can approach this conversation with curiosity instead of defensiveness, and compassion instead of fear, we may find that DEI is not something to resist. It is something that helps us become who we are called to be.

Thanks for digging in today,

-srt 

P.S. If this raised questions for you or stirred something you are still sorting through, that is okay. These conversations matter, and they are better when we have them together. I welcome your thoughts and your questions.

You Matter: A Reminder We All Need

This week, I had a coaching session with a client who came to me feeling worn down, unseen, and questioning her value. As she spoke, I could feel the weight she was carrying, the belief that somehow, she didn’t matter.

And it reminded me of a powerful TEDx talk by Matt Emerzian, where he shares a simple but life-changing truth: you matter.

When We Forget We Matter

My client’s experience is not unusual. So many of us go through seasons where we feel invisible, overwhelmed by responsibility, yet underappreciated. From the outside, life can look fine, but on the inside, it can feel like we’re running on empty.

Matt Emerzian himself once lived that reality. On paper, he had it all, success, career, opportunity, but inside, he was falling apart. Everything changed when someone told him that life isn’t about me, it’s about we. His purpose shifted from chasing status to embracing impact, and that shift made all the difference.

The Ripple Effect of Knowing You Matter

When we forget that we matter, we shrink. We doubt our voice. We live smaller than we were meant to.

But when we remember that we matter, the opposite happens. We come alive. We see that every word, every action, every small kindness has the potential to ripple out and touch others in ways we can’t always measure.

Think about it: a kind word at the right moment, an encouraging text, a simple act of listening, it can change someone’s day, even their life.

Redefining Success

Our culture often tells us that success is about money, power, or recognition. But what if true success is about impact? What if it’s measured by the people we lift up, the hope we spread, and the love we share?

That’s what I reminded my client: her worth is not defined by what she produces, but by who she is. The world is better because she’s in it. And the same is true for you.

My Reminder to You

Maybe you’re reading this and you also need to hear it today: You matter.

Not because of what you do or how perfectly you perform, but because of who you are. Your presence, your kindness, your contributions, they ripple out farther than you know.

So here’s my challenge to you: carry this truth with you into your week. And just as importantly, remind someone else that they matter, too.

Because sometimes the most powerful gift we can give is a simple reminder of what’s already true.

You matter,

-srt

P.S. If you haven't seen You Matter on TedxSanDiego, here is the link:  https://youtu.be/xAcHp0WBbBQ?feature=shared

P.S.S. If you love the TedxSanDiego talk, read Matt Emerzian's book Every Monday Matters: 52 Ways to Make a Difference.