A Glitch in the Matrix: Grace, Growth, and Getting a Grip

You know those days when nothing feels quite real, like you accidentally slipped into a parallel universe where time moves weird, your brain is buffering, and reality keeps glitching? Yeah — that was me last Friday.

It started with a terrible night’s sleep. You know, the kind where you wake up every hour thinking it's time to get up… only to find out you still have three hours until your alarm. By the time morning finally came, I had hit snooze so many times I actually missed the alarm altogether.

No big deal, I thought. I’ll just shift a few things. Until I looked at the clock.

I was already late.

Late for the first thing on my schedule — a meeting I wasn’t mentally (or physically) prepared for. I threw on something vaguely presentable and bolted. As I sat there trying to participate like a functioning adult, I felt that internal tug: I forgot something.

And then it hit me.

I had a second engagement — something important. Something I had committed to with a friend. Something I was supposed to be dressed up for.

Cue the stomach drop.

She was already there. Waiting. And I wasn’t there.  She called me.  I had to admit it slipped my mind.  Then I had to get ready fast and get there.

The Spiral

I could feel the shame rising. That voice in my head started in with the greatest hits:

• “You’re so unreliable.”

• “You can’t even manage a calendar?”

• “Why did you say yes if you couldn’t follow through?”

But then something strange happened — something that felt like a glitch in the matrix in the best way.

Instead of continuing the freefall into self-loathing, another voice quietly cut in:

“Hey. You messed up.  But you’re human.  Give yourself some grace.  Then get a grip.”

And that became the theme of my day.

Giving Myself Grace

Let me be clear: I hate disappointing people. And I especially hate disappointing myself. But grace doesn’t mean pretending it didn’t happen — it means looking at what did happen and responding with compassion, not punishment.

• Grace meant texting my friend and owning it fully: “I completely forgot, and I am truly sorry. I will be there in 10 minutes.”

• Grace meant not catastrophizing this one off-day as a reflection of my character.

• Grace meant recognizing that sleep deprivation and mental clutter aren’t moral failings — they’re warning signs.

Getting a Grip

But grace isn’t the end of the story — it’s the middle.

After the apology and the deep breath, it was time to regroup.

Here’s how I “got a grip”:

1. Checked my calendar for the rest of the week (and set notifications for everything).

2. Asked myself honestly: What systems failed? (Answer: Relying on my memory instead of my two calendars. Again.)

3. Committed to a better sleep routine for the next few nights, not as punishment — but as a reset.

A Final Thought

We all have those “glitch in the matrix” days. Days that start sideways and spiral from there. But they don’t define us.

You are allowed to:

• Be forgetful.

• Be late.

• Disappoint someone.

• Mess up your day.

And still be a good person. A responsible person. A growing person.

Give yourself grace. Then get a grip. And then — try again tomorrow.

Because tomorrow isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being present — and ready for the next glitch.

Happy Thursday you amazing humans,

-srt

Real Leaders Create Culture

Culture isn’t something you hang on the wall. It’s not a mission statement or a catchy slogan. Culture is what people feel every day. It’s shaped by what leaders choose to say, do, reward, and even what they ignore. Every meeting, every interaction, every decision adds another brushstroke to the bigger picture of how it feels to belong to a group, a team, a company, or a community.

Leadership, at its core, is about responsibility—not power. And one of the most important responsibilities of a leader is shaping the kind of environment where people can grow, thrive, and bring their best. Whether you're leading a corporate team, a classroom, a nonprofit group, or your own family, your influence sets the tone.

You don’t need a title to influence culture. You just need to be intentional.

The best leaders—at work, in community groups, even in families—lead by example. They know that every day, in every interaction, they are sending a message about what matters.

• If we say kindness matters but gossip behind someone’s back, we’re not creating a kind culture.
• If we value teamwork but reward competition, we’re not creating a collaborative environment.
• If we talk about inclusion but don’t invite different voices to the table, people notice.

Culture is always watching.

Think about the most impactful leaders you've known. Chances are, it wasn’t their title that made the difference—it was their character. They showed up with empathy. They were clear in their values. They followed through on their word. They didn’t just talk about collaboration or kindness or innovation—they lived it. And that consistency? That’s what shapes culture.

It’s the Little Things That Add Up

Culture is shaped in the small, everyday moments—not just the big, visible ones. Like:

• How we respond when someone shares a new idea.
• Whether we listen without interrupting.
• How we support someone who’s struggling.
• The way we handle disagreement—with curiosity or defensiveness.

These things might seem minor, but together, they define how it feels to be part of the group.

Culture is created by the example leaders set, the behaviors they encourage, and the standards they uphold. It shows in how mistakes are handled, how conflict is addressed, and who feels seen and heard. It lives in how people feel at the start of their day—and at the end of it.

YOU are a Culture Creator

Whether you lead a team, a classroom, a household, or a volunteer project—you are creating culture.

• With your tone.
• With your decisions.
• With your priorities.
• With what you model when you think no one’s watching.
• With what you post on social media.

The question isn’t if you’re shaping culture. It’s what kind of culture you’re creating.

Your Legacy Lives in the Culture You Build

Everyone can help shape the space they’re part of. But real leaders—the ones who choose to lead with intention—know that their legacy isn’t just in what they achieve. It’s in how they make others feel along the way.

Long after a task is done or a goal is reached, people remember how they felt under your leadership.

They remember if they felt safe.
They remember if they felt seen.
They remember if they felt like they mattered.

Real leaders know this.
They choose to lead not just for results—but for people.
And they take culture seriously because they understand: culture creates everything else.

The truth is, culture doesn’t happen by accident. It’s created—by you, by me, by all of us showing up every day with purpose, presence, and heart.

Want to build something that lasts?

Start by being the kind of leader who builds a culture where people thrive.

Because real leaders don’t just react to culture.

They create it.

Happy Thursday, you amazing culture creator,

-srt

Leadership is About Influence, Not Authority

When you hear the word “leader,” what comes to mind? A title? A corner office? A seat at the table? While those may be symbols of leadership, they’re not the source of it. True leadership isn’t about authority. It’s about influence.

Authority is Assigned. Influence is Earned.

Anyone can be given a title, but not everyone can inspire others to follow. Authority relies on hierarchy and structure. Influence, however, comes from trust, respect, and the ability to connect with people on a deeper level. It’s built over time through consistency, credibility, and character.

Think of the leaders who have impacted your life the most. Chances are, their influence didn’t come from power—they earned it through their integrity, their example, and their ability to lift others up.

Influence Transcends Position

Some of the most powerful leaders don’t have formal leadership roles. They’re the people who others turn to for advice, who bring people together, who model the behavior they want to see in others. They shape culture, drive change, and inspire action—without needing to pull rank.

This is especially important in today’s world, where collaboration, agility, and innovation are prized. Leadership isn’t confined to a chain of command—it’s woven into the everyday moments where we choose to step up, speak out, and serve others.

Leaders Influence by Example

Leadership by influence starts with self-leadership. If you want others to trust your voice, they need to see you walking your talk. Whether you’re showing up with empathy, making space for diverse perspectives, or navigating challenges with resilience, your actions are your most persuasive argument.

The most influential leaders are those who:

• Listen before they speak
• Serve before they direct
• Empower instead of control
• Coach instead of command

The Ripple Effect of Influence

When you lead with influence, your impact multiplies. Instead of compliance, you get commitment. Instead of resistance, you foster engagement. People feel seen, heard, and valued—and that kind of environment creates high-performing teams, strong cultures, and lasting change.

As John Maxwell famously said, “Leadership is influence—nothing more, nothing less.” Titles may open doors, but influence opens minds.

So ask yourself:

• Who do you want to influence?
• What kind of impact do you want to leave?
• Are you leading from your position—or from your principles?

True leadership doesn’t require a title. It requires heart, intention, and the courage to show up for others in a way that lifts them higher.

Happy Thursday all,

-srt

Be the Leader You Wish You Had

Think back to the best leader you’ve ever worked with.

What made them unforgettable? Was it their empathy? Their ability to listen? The way they had your back, even when things got tough?

Now think about the worst leader you’ve had. The one who made you feel small. The one who withheld recognition, dismissed your ideas, or led with fear instead of trust.

These experiences—both good and bad—shape us. They show us what leadership can look like, and what it shouldn’t. And they give us a choice:

To either repeat the leadership we endured or become the leader we always needed.

Your Leadership Legacy Starts Now

You don’t have to wait until you’re a VP or have a corner office to start leading with intention. Leadership isn’t about titles—it’s about impact. And the most impactful leaders are often shaped by what they didn’t get from those who came before them.

Maybe you never had a mentor who believed in you > Be that mentor now.

Maybe your ideas were ignored > Be the leader who creates space for every voice.

Maybe you were managed with fear > Lead with trust, not control.

Empathy Over Ego

It’s easy to lead from habit. It’s harder—but more powerful—to lead from awareness.

The leader you wish you had probably wasn’t perfect. But they likely made you feel seen, safe, and supported. They celebrated your wins, challenged you to grow, and guided you through uncertainty without making you feel less than.

You can be that leader—whether you’re managing a team of ten or just starting your first job.

Lead with empathy.  Lead with curiosity.  Lead like someone’s career depends on it—because it might.

The Ripple Effect of Great Leadership

When you lead with intention, your influence reaches far beyond deadlines and deliverables. You shape cultures. You unlock confidence. You model what’s possible for others.

Here’s the truth:

You don’t just change your team—you change people’s lives.

Years from now, someone will say you were the leader they’ll never forget. The one who listened. The one who believed. The one who inspired.

Remember:  Leadership is Personal

At the end of the day, leadership is deeply personal. It’s not just about KPIs or project plans—it’s about people. And every day, you get the chance to choose what kind of leader you will be.

So ask yourself:

• Am I leading from fear or from purpose?
• Am I managing tasks or empowering people?
• Am I the kind of leader I wish I had?

You don’t have to be perfect.  Just present.  Just human.

Be the leader you wish you had—and watch how others rise.

Happy Thursday all,

-srt

P.S. Happy MayDay!